Brownies are my only friends besides the AMAZING, WONDERFUL, LOVELY, TALENTED HUMANS THAT ARE MY REAL FRIENDS WHO I LOVE SO MUCH AND AM SO GRATEFUL FOR BECAUSE LIFE WITHOUT HIGH QUALITY HUMANS IS NOT A LIFE FOR ME.
Things not to do at work
- Do not put on nail polish when no one is there. When people do get there you will still be able to smell the nail polish, even if they can’t, and you will feel like you ate too much shame for breakfast for the entire day.
- Do not heavily rely on music or podcasts/recordings-of-people-talking to cheer you up/feel less lonely. One day your speakers will break for no apparent reason and you will cry (aka today).
- Do not talk to yourself when no one is in the room. Inevitably, someone will walk by and hear you talking to your best friend who happens to be a coffee cup as you discuss what a bad influence it is on you and they will ask if you are okay and you will awkwardly have to say yes.
- Do not forget that the iron is on and accidentally burn the papers that you put next to it. This generally means be aware of your surroundings. Even if you don’t have irons next to your desk.
- Do not look up “Ways to be happier at work” or click on any articles that claim to tell you how to do that. They are for people who actually have full-time jobs they have worked their whole lives for and have to do things other than answer phones and tweet occasionally. It will only make you mad when it says “learn how to cooperate better.” COOPERATE WITH WHAT?! MY SPEAKERS HAVE ALREADY BROKEN AND I AM TALKING TO AN EMPTY COFFEE CUP I THINK I’VE GOT MY PEOPLE UNDER CONTROL MAN
- Probably not a good idea to go on tumblr while you are at work. Just saying. Also I am at work right now so I probably have no authority whatsoever to tell you anything.
This floor is so nice. I love this floor. I love floors. I don’t think I will go to that get together because I don’t think I really like those things. Maybe I’m being anti-social. Maybe I’m being smart. I think it’s okay. My butt feels happy on this rug and my hair feels soft on my arms so who cares.
"It is cloudy, breezy, 63 degrees and 4:50."
I am on this road earlier than usual. Running early, like I ran that red light. At least I think I did, or rolled it. It’s hard to know when you are driving exactly what you are doing, there are too many things.
The mailman will let me know soon enough.
And I am only me, and it is four different things all at once and it makes me sad that it can be so many and I can only feel like one. And it makes me mad that it can be four different things and I have to sit and stare at the lights in front of me and the only thing that I am being is stuck in traffic.
It is four and I am one and I arrive five minutes earlier than usual and that is all that happens.
This bike makes me want to cry.
Things that have made me cry in the past 2 months:
- Essays regarding being naked.
- Listening to “Samson” or “Jessica” by myself.
- Missing folks.
- My birthday.
- Telling my Pigeon and Hawk story.
Things I have done twice in my life:
- Drive on Route 3
- Have chicken pox
- Make cream puffs
- Open a bank account
- Vomit outside
- Eat a frittata